I just got out of an abusive situation a few weeks ago and lately I’ve been missing him a lot. Like he did really fucked shit no doubt and I had a dream last night that imitated a fight we would have except more intense. It was a warped version of him and at some point in the dream I was ready to leave but I still wanted to stay and say my proper goodbyes. I turned around and tried to say what I’d been wanting to, I even hugged him but I felt nothing. When I woke up I just felt shaken, not like I’d gotten closure just that I wanted him to be there to show me that it was all a dream, hold me and hug me to make it all disappear. We’ve been broken up since Sept, but we’d been living together until I had to leave. I know what he did I know he’s bad for me I’m so angry at him for everything he put me through and the arguing and the fights...he turned everyone against me he was awful to me why do I miss him? He made me feel so crazy all the time and the stress was unbearable I don’t understand why I would miss him at all