Help processing bad appointment?

Question

I had my first ultrasound, labs, and doctor’s appointment yesterday. We were trying to determine dates and viability, because I got pregnant right after my IUD was removed (I did not have a period). I *think* I’m 5w6d today (so 5w5d at my appointment). I had my first very faint positive pregnancy test on 5/20. 
During the ultrasound they found a gestational sac and yolk sac, but no fetal pole. This made sense to me, as I know the fetal pole isn’t generally visible until 6 1/2 weeks or later. My hcg was 8,000 which is right in range for 5w5d. 
My doctor, however, was like, “Well, no fetal pole. You’re probably having a miscarriage. You’ll likely start bleeding over the weekend.”
And I thought that was so crappy!!! She completely stole my joy and hope, and had no care or compassion for me and this wanted pregnancy. Especially because I don’t think it’s unreasonable based on the data we have to assume that it was just too early to see the fetal pole. 
Am I off base here? Am I in denial?

Answer

So my hcg were 32,000 and when I had my ultrasound at 5w5d I thought I was 6w5d, we only saw a gestational sac, yolk sac and no embryo. My doctor wasn't concerned at all. I certainly was, theoretically with my hcg being so high I figured an embryo at the very least would have been seen. 6 days later I went in because I was bleeding and there was a gestational sac and yolk sac only still my hcg was 106,590. I knew at that point it was a miscarriage. 2 days later had my normal OB appointment and holy cow there was still the gestational sac, yolk sac, an embryo with a heartbeat that measured 6w4d. Don't lose hope!!!

Answer

Please find a new OB. I would be SO mad

Answer

That is crazy! Don't listen to her-- at 5 weeks, there isn't always a fetal pole. I don't know why a doctor would ever offer negative news like that without other factors like: you're bleeding and cramping, your known dates are off by two weeks, your HCG levels are super high with no fetal pole, etc.
I'm used to doctors reassuring me when I knew something is wrong (I've lost 2), and that has been annoying and I felt like bad bedside. But at least they were trying to offer hope she not kill joy for no reason 😡
It sounds like you already know to ignore her, but I know it's gotten in your head. Plan to go back in 2 weeks to see a healthy bean.

Answer

Update:
My hcg was tested on Sat (6 weeks exactly) and came back at 14,000 which is a doubling time of 2.5 days. Crappy doctor was slightly more optimistic about viability and is asking me to come in for a US on Thursday (6w5d).

Answer

Don’t give up. I went to my first appointment mid May ‘21 because I was having bleeding for two weeks straight and I took a test and was positive and I thought for sure I was miscarrying Doctor did a sonogram and stated I was measuring behind based off my LMP. But she assured me to come back in 2 weeks because if it’s early that could be the reason they can’t hear a heart beat etc. I came back 2 weeks later and baby had a heart beat and fetal pole. So don’t lose hope. Last year 202 I was pregnant and right off the bat at my first appointment the OBGYN was rude and told me that I can have an abortion if I didn’t plan this pregnancy and then when he did my sonogram he told me oh your a few weeks behind from your LMP and you are miscarrying. I was so shattered at my first appointment really. I did end up miscarrying but I think it was due to all the stress and worrying. It was about 2-3 weeks later that I miscarried but either way I’m glad I made the switch. My doctor currently is 100% better. Please look at changing it will definitely benefit you and your baby.

Answer

My dear I am going through the same thing, the doctor told me maybe I'm having a miscarriage they then give me a week to return. On my next visit they were shocked that I didn't bleed and said maybe its 2 small to be visible so they reschedule me again. God is good I believe its to early still so just give it time.

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That’s so weird, your OB sounds like she had a bitter day. Definitely switch

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I had an appointment at what I thought was 5 weeks 6 days and they only saw the gestational sac and yolk sac and said I was measuring 5 weeks 2 days. My hcg at that point was 5100. I went back 9 days(yesterday) and there was a baby with a healthy heartbeat! Stay hopeful!

Answer

Absolutely not!!! I am going through the same thing right now, and did with my daughter as well!
With my daughter I didn't know exactly when I ovulated and when we had our dating ultrasound there was a gestational sac and yolk sac measuring 6w 3d. We waited a week and there she was! Measuring 6w5d.
This time it was very similar. I had my IUD removal on April 2 and started my period April 4. We decided not to start tracking for ovulation for a couple months and just have sex. So the week the app said I would ovulate I really doubted I was and thought the next week I was (due to CM and cervical position) so then we had a vvvfl on 5-9 like I'm talking squint and have the lights all the way up, but by the Friday it was very obviously positive. So I got into the Dr and had my dating scan and was measuring 6w0d even though according to my LMP I should be 7w4d. My new doctor (my old one retired 😭) called me out of work to basically tell me the same thing yours told you. She also ordered labs and a repeat ultrasound for this week. My HCG was nearly 40,000 which is within the range of 6 weeks. I have my scan tomorrow so fingers crossed little babe is where he/she is supposed to be and is growing healthily.
As I type this my 2 year old is laying on my chest, the baby that the ultrasound tech told me wasn't there and that I should prepare for a miscarriage. She is healthy and happy. Hopefully everything is fine, you'll be in my thoughts!

Answer

She's crazy!!! You're going g to go back and baby will be there just perfect and fine ❤ she's projecting based on past negative personal experience, I'm sure

Help processing bad appointment?

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