Advice on setting ground rules before baby is born

How did you set ground rules for your baby with friends/family? My MIL has turned into a complete and utter nightmare since my husband and I told her we are pregnant and I can tell I need to set down ground rules now. Any tips on how to do so (kindly, but very firmly)?

To be more specific about the ground rules to be set, we aren’t even out of the first trimester and she’s already weirdly possessive of our baby as well as telling everyone she meets that I’m pregnant when we have specifically asked her multiple times not to tell anyone because we have not announced yet and don’t plan on announcing for a few more weeks. I was actually so worried she would say something publicly on social media that I drove 8 hours back to my hometown to tell my grandparents I was pregnant before she could ruin that for us. It’s so frustrating, especially because the town she lives in is suuuuper tiny (less than 3,000 people) and she works at the front desk of the only tire shop in town, and my husband works at the local auto parts store there, so most of her customers/friends also know my husband and are his customers/friends too!

I’m also very concerned about her dog. He’s a Pitt bull and don’t get me wrong, I actually love pitts, I had one growing up and he was the best! The problem is, this dog has some kind of neurological issue. We don’t know exactly what is wrong with him, but he’s not right. He’s also never had any shots before and was never socialized with any other dogs. I do not even take my dogs over to my MIL’s house any more because of this, and also because she snuck her dog on a leash into the room my dogs were in while my husband and I were distracted talking to my FIL. I have told her many times I am not comfortable with our dogs interacting because her dog has almost killed another dog that got into their backyard once. And she just sneaks her 130lbs dog in (who weighs the same as she does) and puts both of my dogs live’s at risk, as well as my own because when she brought her dog in, I was in between her dog and my dogs! Her dog locked eyes with one of mine and started creeping towards her and I had to yell at my MIL to get the dog out. She said “Well they have to meet at some point!” And I said “No they WILL NOT.” And took both of my dogs and left. So as you can see, she clearly does not have any respect for what I say when it comes to my dogs, I can’t even imagine what it’s going to be like when it comes to our child! She’s in total denial that her dog could ever hurt a fly and didn’t believe my husband when he told her that her dog attacked another and almost killed it. I just know she’s going to want us to bring our baby over to her house and I am not comfortable with that at all because the dog is totally unpredictable and unreadable. If he were in a separate room, it wouldn’t be so bad but I don’t think she’s going to be willing to do that and will say “Well they have to meet at some point!” I think the best option is just to not take our baby to their house period but I’m worried it will upset my husband. Obviously I will talk with him about this, and I’ve already started voicing my concerns for bringing our baby around their house, but how could I go about this sensitively? I do not want to upset him because it is his parents and of course I want them to be involved, to an extent, in our childs life. I just feel at a loss. I don’t want to start a rift between us all because it’s just more added stress that I don’t need, and she’s added enough of that already!

I’m already thinking of rules for labor and whatnot and I’m at a point where I don’t even want to tell her when I go into labor or have her come to the hospital at all because I’m afraid she’s going to announce to the whole world I’m in labor and then try to announce our baby’s birth and a picture of the baby before we even get a chance to.

Honestly there’s a lot of other things that need to be addressed too, but right now these are my main concerns and they’re stressing me out so much. If anyone has any advice or tips, please help 😓😭 Also please know, she was NOT like this whatsoever and gave no warning signs that she would act like this when I married my husband. It’s not been until the past like.. 6 months that any of this started and I’ve known her for 8 years..