P3

Sorry long story but I don’t understand why I feel this way but at the same i do.

When me and my boyfriend first started dating maybe like a month into the relationship, I cheated on my boyfriend with an ex I honestly didn’t want to have sex with my ex but it was Peer-pressured that’s how it’s always been with most guy besides the one of with right now he let’s me ask him, let’s be ready…etc. No there was no reason for me cheat, there’s never a reason to cheat in my opinion, he treats me good respects me cares for me..etc. The reason I was at my ex house was because we had a final project we had to do together at our school, also my boyfriend already graduated and once we picked our first person, like the first time we pick a partner for a project, we have to keep them till the end of the school year which me and him was together then(my ex) we was working on the project he asked me to go down on him I told him I didn’t want to do that I don’t want too cheat on my boyfriend, then he started touching on me I became real still didn’t say a word till he tried to stick his finger in me it was getting awkward and uncomfortable so I did what he told me to do and what he wanted me to do, we had sex when he was done which he didn’t inside me I felt disgusting and left immediately, I asked my boyfriend to come to my house so I could talk to him, my ex was trying to go another round I told him no and left fast, and told him that’ll I do the project myself. Then I left, when my boyfriend got there I told him what happened he was upset about it but he forgave me, and told me if this ever happens again he’s leaving me which I understood and I honestly was 100% sure he was going to leave me then but I was relieved he didn’t but if he did I was going to face my consequences of my actions, it’s been a few months since that happened and I still feel bad about it, I’ve never cheated on him again and we’re very happy together after a week or so after I told him we got right back on track but I just feel like I don’t deserve him for what I did🙁