Double rainbow & Anxious

Hi everyone,

I just need to vent a little to people who could understand how I feel.

I have an 11 year old son.

I got pregnant July 2020,everything was good until I woke up bleeding at 19 weeks. Due to incompetent cervix, I lost my son November 1st 2020.

My doctor told me I could try again when I’m ready, I’m not sure you can ever be because it is extremely hard to not be stressed an anxious when you get pregnant again.

So I got pregnant January 2021. I had to get a cervical stitch, got that at 13+2 and 5 days later ended up in the hospital and lost that baby at 14 weeks.

My doctor told me to wait 2-3 months. No I wasn’t trying to get pregnant, I was tracking my ovulation to avoid it. But my cycle changed from 33 to 28 and the week I thought I was avoiding pregnancy I got pregnant. So now I’m 4 weeks pregnant, due April 3rd (got pregnant about the exact same time I got pregnant last year, my due dates is 2 days off)

So now I’m extremely anxious, terrified and just have no faith in my body. I feel like this pregnancy will end in an early miscarriage, I don’t know why but I just do.

No only am I worried about getting through the first trimester, with my history I can’t stop worrying until I give birth to a healthy baby.