Why am I so attached after he did that..

Question

I’ve been with my now ex bf for 5 years & a few months ago I found out he had an old man suck him off for $300... I don’t believe that was the only thing that happened.. but that’s all he claims happened. I stopped having sex with him & ended up finding out he was being sneaky. I had him leave our apartment but now I’m constantly concerned what he’s doing, what girl he’s with & it’s like I have to remind myself why tf am I worried about a man that cheated on me with an OLD MEN...????? Possibly could’ve given me an STD?? But there’s still times I blow his phone up just sad about it. He was my person.. I don’t really have family & maybe 1 friend.. we lived together for the last 3 years and idk just miss him around and bothered by the thought of him being with someone else

Answer

It’s normal to still feel attached. It can take a long time to get over a relationship even if it ended badly. Just try to take it a day at a time and keep yourself occupied so you won’t feel the need to call or text.

Answer

Sometimes the people who treat us the worst are the hardest to let go of. I struggled really bad with my breakup from my abusive ex but it’s normal to have these feelings

Answer

You have to love yourself. I know its easier said than done. But take the time to fill your day with things that cater to u so u dont think of him. Make a music playlist.  Go out to try a new local restaurant or ice cream shop. Look up on youtube places to visit in your city or nearby you never been to..... parks, attractions, local eateries. Book a hair appt. Make a spa and movie night with your favorite snacks. Do things that u like and enjoy! It works like a charm!

Answer

So why be with someone who cheats and you can't trust?

Answer

It's totally normal to feel how your feeling

Answer

It’s normal to still be attached to someone you shared years if your life with. But he was definitely NOT your person if he was willing to cheat on you and maybe that is something to keep reminding yourself about. Someone who is truly a partner and your other half wouldn’t be putting you through this. My best suggestion since it doesn’t sound like you have kids together so there’s no need for further communication. Block him on everything, even if you have to deactivate social media to prevent yourself from unblocking him. Occupy yourself with outings, family, rekindle friendships you might’ve left behind, he is not worth blowing up his phone her and like you said he could’ve put you in harms way with STD’s. You’re worth more and have to remind yourself to treat yourself like so.

Answer

is it possible you might have a trauma bond with him ?

Why am I so attached after he did that..

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