Feeling Last all the time

I just want some advice on how to address a few issues in my marriage. I feel as if I have to remind my husband to do anything, for example; cook the children's dinner, I have to remember every birthday, sort gifts etc for our children and his family. I have to remember every doctor appointment, do all shopping etc. I feel mentally drained being everyone's memory constantly.

We had a fight that wasnt resolved yesterday about the lack of consideration for me when I've had enough, especially when the children or baby need something. For example we went out to eat, I paced and entertained our 1 year old so my husband could eat and have a chat with his family, after around 20 minutes I was tired and just wanted to sit down. I gave our son to my husband and as soon as he realised our son wasn't going to sit down without crying he put him on the floor, I had to stop our son from leaving the space where our table was and my husband made no effort to get up and get our baby before he toddled from us. I didn't want to argue with my husband in front of his family so I just took our son and got ready to leave. I just need advice on how to cope with feeling last all the time and how/ if there's a way to address this.