My dilemma……….I need really good advice.

So I been working with this guy going on two years now. I know everything about him and he me. I liked (maybe love) him for some time know but never had the courage to tell him. But I always suspected he know, In my 28 years I never dated before and to be honest I’m afraid to. He’s pretty shy as well and he told me that he have never asked out a woman because of his shyness, all the girlfriends he have ever had approached him first. I think he may have asked my out a couple of times but me being me I rejected him. Not because I didn’t like him, like I said I really do like him. It’s just we work together and he’s 4 years younger then me and I didn’t see the relationship going to far. Needless to say he started dating this girl that’s also work with us. They dated for some months before they broke up. He also got a girl pregnant as well. But he was fooling with this girl before his ex and after I rejected him. He didn’t tell me about the baby till after she was born. Which I understand it wasn’t non of my business to begin with. At this time him and his baby mama was not together. But they was co parenting. And we begin to flirt with each other again. Now in all this time we have never messed around seen each other out of work or got each other phone number. We only communicated inside work. With all the flirting we was doing we I still very shy and to be honest with y’all I’m very insecure about myself. I would wonder what he saw in me? What he liked about me? And there was many times where he would reassure me. But me being me I would doubt him.

Fast forward new people were hired. And one of those people was a woman. She was everything I was not funny, witty, outgoing, vocal, and not not afraid to speak her mind. The guy and new girl being to become friends. I knew he didn’t like in that way and she didn’t like him either (she’s married with 2 kids) I don’t know why but being to get possessive and super jealous. I know I not a good look but I really couldn’t help myself. And I’m working on it. But after the Christmas break last year he decided to try and make it work with his baby mama so now they’re together. Again he didn’t tell me, the new girl brought it up while we was all working together. He looked like a deer in headlights. And he finally told me everything. We not as close as we used to be. And all honesty it’s hurts, I try to keep it as professional as possible out of respect of his girlfriend. I think I my love him but there’s nothing I can do about it now. I missed my chance. And I wish him the best of luck.