**TW** Is it what I think it is.....?

Hi, this may be a bit long winded so please bare with me.

I've been with partner for two years last month. Lately things haven't been great between mainly due to me still being friends with my ex, who is also my sons dad. We separated on very good terms and we still have a lot of contact. Our son is 5 and still doesn't really understand about mummy and daddy not being together. Me and my partner don't live together due to him having issues with his daughter who is 10. My partner has been married twice before and both marriages failed and doesn't get on with either of them. My ex comes round to my house often to see my son as this is how we co parent and I feel is the best way to do it. Lately my partner has been getting very angry with me having my ex round to see his son. He has been verbally abusive towards me and stalking to me by driving past my house to check I'm home or if my sons dad's car is here. If he sees his car here he kicks off and gives me abuse about it. He is on anti depression tablets which we went through together last year and it was very difficult to go through. I suffer with mental health issues myself and every day is a struggle but I stuck by him. He has been blaming his behaviour on his depression and insecurities, but doesn't stop to think how I feel through his actions. This resulted in him sending me a picture of a knife he said he had sharpened ready, I asked him what it was ready for to which he sent me a picture of his throat with the knife held against it. I didn't retaliate to it as I felt he was just trying to get attention from me or get me to go around and stop him as we hadn't seen each other for over a week. As soon as he realised I was rising to it he put the knife away. Last year he had a drinking problem which resulted in him forcing himself on me. I don't drink so I was sober and I kept saying no but he didn't listen to me. I had suffered a miscarriage at 9 weeks and was still bleeding as it was only 2 weeks after it had happened. He claims he doesn't remember what happened properly to this day and says he only has my word to follow. I don't want to use the R word but would you class that as it? I just don't know what to do anymore. Thank you for reading this far xx