Would you consider me not healthy enough for a baby?

Question

For starters, I just got off my anti depressants. I have been diagnosed with Anxiety and depression. My anxiety causes me to have very unhealthy habits such as: 
Not eating nearly enough (always feeling sick) 
Not sleeping well 
Severe Nail chewing 
Lay In bed all day 
Not get important things done 
To top it off, I really struggle with my weight. I am only 95 pounds and I am 22 years old and 5ft 4. 
I wanna start trying for a baby but I’m scared I’m just not healthy. My mom thinks if I got pregnant it would fix my appetite and weight issue but I wanted to get that sorted out BEFORE pregnancy. 
I don’t drink nearly enough water, don’t eat more than about 1,000 calories a day, I sleep terrible etc. 
Would you say I’m too unhealthy to have a baby? 
Btw- I am married and we are pretty self sufficient.

Answer

I feel like this is a question between you and your doctor. Do you feel healthy enough or are you assuming you're unhealthy? Anxiety and depression alone isn't enough to not have a baby. However, having a baby can make those things worse. Is there is a reason why you've stopped taking medication? The things you mentioned can be fixed or treated. However, coming from someone with anxiety and depression (and a 2.5 year old) I would get myself situated first before bringing a baby into this world. It's something I wish I did because ppd and ppa was really rough on me and I'm still struggling today. Since everyone and every body is different I don't think strangers should be the ones telling you if you're healthy enough.

Answer

None of this sounds like an environment to grow a baby or bring a baby into. Sort yourself first, then have a baby.

Answer

You dont sound mentally healthy and that will impact everything in life. Maybe look into ashwaganda or st johns wort for anxiety. It suppose to be a natural supplement  that helps. I took ashwaganda and it did help tremendously.
    Also diet and exercise are directly related to mental health. Ive done extensive research because i honestly thought i needed to be medicated for depression. Some things i have done and learned…
    1. Gut microbiome is directly related to mental health. You may be deficient in vitamin and minerals that counteract depression. I strted eating leafy greens, brocolli, strawberries, blueberries, and other veggies and felt a big impact. Limit junk food and processed foods. They deplete the body. An occasional treat ok but if u not eating more than 1,000 calories then what u eat matters. 
     I also started taking supplements that have shown to hve an impact… probiotics, omega fish oil, b12 , and vitamin d. B12 helps body absorb the vitamins. I walk in sunlight to get vitamin d.
     
    2. Exercise will help release dopamine to help counteract depression. Simply go for a 30 minute walk. Drink water.
  
There arnt quick fixes. Popping pills wont always work. Sometimes we hve to look at out daily habits and lifestyle. The last thing that made tremendous impct was daily prayer and listening to motivational pstors such as joel Osteen. Im no longer in a depressive state after years and these things have truly worked wonders!

Answer

you don’t sound mentally ready or physically capable of being ready to make the lifestyle changes to best support your own pregnancy

Answer

Your current lifestyle does not seem conducive to having a baby. Pregnancy also does not guarantee weight gain. I had pregnancy induced IBS and lost weight my entire pregnancy. The only weight I gained, was that of my baby/fluid. By 28 weeks I was actually 15lbs less than my starting weight. If your having a hard time mentally with small tasks, sleeping, getting out of bed etc; having a baby will not help that situation. Maybe meet with your doctor/therapist and try to focus on getting you in the best space both mentally and physically for a baby.

Answer

It’s really important to eat enough in pregnancy so that you can provide your baby the nutrients to grow and develop properly. Also, lying in bed for hours/days isn’t an option with a newborn or kids. You should talk to your doctor about this and see if you can find a medication that helps your anxiety and depression and is also safe for pregnancy. I know many people who have been able to continue with their meds (or started new ones) while pregnant. I wouldn’t recommend trying for a baby if you do not feel you are in a stable place mentally yet as the hormones, lack of sleep and everything else can really impact your mental health and make things worse. Newborns depend on you for everything. If you are struggling to look after your own basic needs it’s going to be really challenging to look after another little persons too ♥️

Answer

Bring a baby into the world when you feel good about yourself and where you’re at (physically&mentally). 
If you’re asking these questions you should hold off on having a child. Child rearing is time consuming and if your life doesn’t consistent of healthy habits beforehand it is going to be hard to implement them post birth.

Answer

I agree with other comments, this is a better conversation to have between your medical provider and/or therapist. 
Also, regardless if you’re “healthy” or “not,” seems like you wanted to in your words above sort out some things before baby. To me that seems like you would prefer to wait to have a baby at this time. And if you want to wait, you should wait

Answer

When I was pregnant.. I suffered terrible sickness.. I lost alot of weight.. It really got me down.. having a baby is exciting but exhausting.. I suffer from depression and anxiety so I know how u feel.. my baby girl is my world.. she is the reason I wake up in the morning.. I eat when she eats.. I take her out so I'm also getting my exercise.. it's turned my life around.. but I know that's not the same with everyone.. having a baby can also isolate u.. friends turn away from u.. people don't ask about u anymore.. relationships get more strained.. so til ur strong enough mentally.. and work hard to get better.. then u should think about it.

Answer

I said yes only because you remind me of my little sister and we have almost lost her a few times because of her health.  Pregnancy is no joke and can result in death even with a perfectly fit and healthy mother.  Then comes being totally responsible for taking care of not only yourself but a tiny little human who is completely dependent on you for everything and your mental health WILL take a hit, even if it’s only temporary. 
That being said many of us with mental health problems and other health concerns have wonderful pregnancies and enjoy our babies very much.  Definitely talk to you doctor about what your goals are (not your mother’s) and enlist their help and advice to get there.

Would you consider me not healthy enough for a baby?

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