Can’t find my IUD strings and partner won’t help me

Maybe TMI but I’m having anxiety now, anyone who’s had the Mirena IUD how do you check for your strings? I just checked for mine and cannot find it at all, I’ve been having heavy abnormal bleeding the last week or 2 and pretty bad cramping in my pelvic/lower back area since day before yesterday. I usually never have cramps but I just called my OB and got an appointment for them to check it out I’m freaking out though and wondering if I could maybe check for it a different way other than squatting? Maybe I just couldn’t reach in that position I have small hands my partner has way longer fingers than I do so I asked if he would help me and see if he could feel it, he told me I shouldn’t have gotten a birth control that I knew I couldn’t maintenance myself so he’s no help. Has anyone ever had theirs come out of place and if so how did you know?😅