Is the bond we have strange?

Hey, ladies. Happy New Years! Only the second day into January and here I am, already looking for stranger’s opinions. Haha

Yesterday, my friend and I were hanging out and she expressed to me that she felt that my relationship with my husband was a bit unhealthy and disturbing to her. She said she had finally found the courage to tell me how she felt.

For starters, I’m twenty-five and my husband is thirty-seven years old. We’ve been together for almost seven years. We have three small kids together. He’s my one and only! I don’t know another man’s touch nor love. I love him unconditionally and I’m sure he feels the same about me.

Now, here is the part my friend finds odd. My husband has a dominant personality I’ll say. He always been the type that likes to be in control and just likes things to go his way. With that being said, over the years, my husbands has incorporated a bunch of rules into our relationship, with my agreement of course. I’m a stay at home mom and my husband think we should plan on homeschooling the kids. My husband takes care of me the kids pretty well financially. Always have new clothes and shoes. He even gets my nails and hair done sometimes when money isn’t tight. My husband has absolute control of everything within our relationship/family and makes 95% of the decisions. My husband chooses what we all eat and drink. If he says I can’t have a piece of cake, than I better not eat it. He chooses what me and the kids wear, right down to the what earrings goes in our ears. I have a curfew most times and he does not. I do everything in the house as far as caring for the babies, laundry, cleaning, cooking, you name it. My husband is allowed to talk and sleep with other women, as long as he’s using protection and getting checked every three months. I am NOT allowed to talk to or even flirt with other men though. He controls when I’m allowed to smoke or have a alcoholic drink. I am not allowed to take birth control. If I fuck up and do something that ticks hims off, he’s allowed to pop me in my nose or hand. Same way you would a child. A little love tap, nothing too crazy. He does this in public at times too. He’s allowed to do whatever he wants to me when it comes to the bedroom. This includes, slaps, hitting, spitting, anal, roughness, insults, whatever he’s in the mood to do weather I want to or not. The list goes on. I basically cater to his every need. Let me remind you ladies, that everything I mentioned is something I AGREED to.

These facts about my relationship concerns my friend, because she feel as though my husband is using me and actually abusing me. I told her that that isn’t the case and this is all something i to agreed to and that I actually enjoyed having my husband be in control of everything when it comes to me and his family. Having to make life decisions on my own was a lot for someone who suffers with bad anxiety like me. Now that he makes them all for me and my babies. I don’t have to think to much. I told her I don’t mind putting complete trust into my husband and that she doesn’t have to worry about me. I like being submissive. I like my husband to be able to be free to be himself. My husband has always been very honest about everything and has always talked to me before adding the rules. My friend think it isn’t healthy for me or the kids. I think as long as no one is hurt and everyone is happy we should be fine.

What do you guys think?! Is my relationship with my husband weird?? Opinions? Is there anyone else in a similar relationship/situation as? Lol Yes; please be kind and don’t judge!!! Yes, I really did agree to all his terms and still have confidence within myself. 😅😂

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Hello again. I want to thank everyone for the advice and opinions.

I would like to add that yes, the relationship my husband and I have is very unusual and I understand everyone’s concerns. Like I expressed to my friend, it’s not as bad as it sounds. My husband is for the most part, a sweet and loving person. I allow him to sleep with other women, because my husband has a sex drive that I could never satisfy alone. When it comes to him controlling what the kids and I eat and wear, he makes decisions in regards to our health. For example, I told him I wanted to lose the baby weight and ever since he has made sure I eat healthy by controlling what I eat. Same with the clothes. I always use to wear sweatpants and t shirts, he makes me dress up. The little taps he does to me when he’s ticked off rarely ever hurts. Sometimes, I don’t want to do certain sexual acts in the bedroom, but it isn’t rape, because like mentioned above, I agreed to do it in order to please him. When he’s happy, our home is happy. He does have a hard time when it comes to the kids crying though, (We have very young kids. Two still in diapers.) but that’s cause works really hard to support us all financially and make so we live comfortable. He brought me a car and he lets me pick my nail colors and many other little things.

I have read every single comment and I understand why you guys may view my relationship in a negative light. Even if I wanted to, I could never really leave. I have never worked a job a day in my life. Never went to college. I don’t have money nor any bank accounts in my name. I just never needed to do those things. I’ve tried applying before and no one would hire. I have three children, will most likely have more in the future. I would never be able to support myself and my little ones alone the way my husband do now. I don’t really have any other family besides him anyways. Please don’t worry about the kids. Mommy always make sure they are okay before anything and anyone else. Thanks a lot guys and take care ok. I won’t have this app for much longer.