Feeling conflicted

Hey girls so I just wanted to reach out for some advice because I’m struggling with handling my breakup. I found out not too long ago that my bf cheated on me, we were together for just over 2 years and during that time he had a baby on me and also cheated during my pregnancy🤦🏻‍♀️ so as you can imagine… it’s been a LOT. I’m nearly 36 weeks so super close to giving birth.

I have been so angry about what he did to the point where I literally pray to God before I leave my house that I don’t see him.. bcos I don’t know how I will act. I blocked his number but he keeps calling me on private. I haven’t picked up. He’s also come to my house a couple times but I aired him. The last time we spoke I told him we can be cool for the baby but that’s it. But bare in mind I only found out about the cheating a few weeks ago, I’m still not over what happened and now I’m stressing out bcos what if I give birth next week and then idk what to do??? Like even tho I told him he can see the baby etc because I know how important it is for children to have a relationship with their parents, I also feel like I’m just not ready to see him. And I want to give myself time to heal but time really ain’t on my side rn.

Do you think it’s okay if I contact him maybe in like month or two? Obviously by that point our baby will be born and he’s gonna miss out on seein him as a newborn etc. Does that make me selfish? Should I just contact him as soon as the baby is born? I just don’t know what to do I wanna do right by my son but I also just want to be happy and feel like cutting him off for now is the best thing for my mental health. What would you do?