This might be all over the place and for that I am sorry.

My husband got a vasectomy in December because we both felt like we were done. Like we just knew our family was complete. We have been pulling out the last 2 years until recently.

Well... we have NOT been able to go get his sperm tested yet. I know bad on us. But the doctor is an hour away, and we can't just drop it off we have to make an appointment, and he hasn't been able to take that time off yet for it. But this past week he has talked me into just seeing what happens. Basically if it works then our family is definitely meant to be us 4 and if not then we are meant to add another. I was all on board at first. But now I'm scared!! Idk if I actually want another baby. I'm overweight from the last 2 still so I'm having body image issues. I haven't been in a good mental health state, I mean it's fine but I basically had Ppd after our 2nd that I didn't realize or admit to until it was just full blown depression. My husband took a job change during the time covid hit and he makes way less, him and I don't even have health insurance we just pay out of pocket if we need to be seen. Luckily our kids do though. So now it's just like ughh I definitely don't think I'll be ready if it does happen and to top it off.. I was ovulating during the week we stopped pulling out. Don't get me wrong though, I at times do feel like we aren't complete. I often times do feel like we did make a mistake on jumping the gun on the vasectomy. And I definitely get baby fever a lot. So I know I'd still be happy regardless. Just a little more worried.

However I did read that there is a high chance that by 3 months that the vasectomy is working. And I've read that the chance of it actually failing is not as common as it seems. We definitely did pull out a lot in between which they say to have so many ejaculations in order to make sure. But now I am definitely just nervous to find out what's going to happen lol. It's like the ultimate test.