Just a question here.

So I am a 10 year recovered opiate addict. I had a less that fantastic experience at a hospital recently where my ovary basically exploded because of a cyst and I bled internally. I knew it was happening because I had just had it discovered at my annual pap and was warned it would happen. And when it happened, I KNEW what it was. I came in and said hey this is what’s wrong with me and I am hurting so bad that it is scaring me. I didn’t know if I was continuing to bleed out.

I got back and had an IV placed and got a vaginal ultrasound.

As soon as they realized I was right and obviously in pain, they immediately rolled me out of the ultrasound room and injected morphine into my IV with no warning. They didn’t say anything they simply walked in and did it, and my whole body tensed up in a FULL body muscle cramp and It hurt so bad. Everything hurt so bad. They were panicked and asking me what was wrong and I said “I don’t know! That hurt extremely bad!” And my face felt funny so they gave me Benadryl in fear that it was an allergic reaction. I felt my bones ache when that morphine spread.

I told them after finding out it was morphine that I am a recovering addict and the nurse looked like he was about to crap his pants.

The doctor came in and I got it all figured out eventually and got better from my ovary issue. I just wish they had said hey this is what we are doing instead of just walking in and doing it without saying anything. Idk maybe that’s my fault, I should have said that or made it known faster. But I was in so much pain I wasn’t thinking about anything else but pain.

I was having this conversation with another former opiate addict. If they ever take opiates now they puke and cramp up like they’re going into immediate withdrawal so even with their recent surgery, they refused anything but ibuprofen.

I’ve noticed that I can’t handle them at all either now. I sat and talked to that doctor I had about me being an addict because he prescribed norco for me to take home and he explained to me that as long as I take it exactly how prescribed, it would be okay. Something about how if you’re in actual pain opiates operate different vs when you’re abusing them. He said I would be in pain for exactly 48 more hours and I was being given just enough to last me until I would no longer need them. I woke up that night in pain and ate a pill and immediately barfed it back up. I threw them away.

I can’t really remember my withdrawal from hard long term abuse, that was a decade ago.

But maybe it is literally immediate withdrawal.

I’m putting something into my body that my body was previously addicted to, so when I do that my whole body gets pissed maybe?

Puking and cramping up like that while you’re entire abdomen feels like it’s being ripped apart because it’s full of blood is more painful than just the original pain. So that’s what I chose. To not be even more miserable.

I wonder if it’s like this for all long term recovered opiate addicts?

When I found out it was morphine I panicked worrying about my sobriety and even talked to the doctor about it and my fear being sent home on pain killers, but even there high on morphine I was like “wow. I feel like shit.”