I’m starting to hate my life

My bd/bf has a superior/competitive complex. Hence why I’m a stay at home mom. When I was a lead/manager at my old job he brings it up like “anyone can do that” and belittles it then starts to compare it to his job. Which is a mechanic. Now that he changes careers and is in business, he hasn’t been paid for 3 weeks and now we’re broke as shit. Can’t even buy formula for our son. I cook, clean, etc, basically whatever a sahm does and he doesn’t help with the kids at all just because he’s the bread winner. I’m expected to do everything with little help. If we play fight and I tap him soft, he has to tap me back harder than I did. I’m scared one day he’s going to black out and start hitting me hard if I do something wrong like for example, throw a ball in a playful manner. Everything is always a competition with him which I don’t understand because we’re supposed to be a fucking team. Idk if it’s because he’s a “retired gang member” but he’s changed in good ways except for the fact that sometimes he sees me as a competitor. Ugh I’m so fuckinf lost and want him to change that about him or help guide him to see how he treats me sometimes