What does this mean?

Hi everyone, how’s it going?

I need strangers perspective on this and what better forum then to use this, right!?

Basically, I’ve been on this dating app and I matched with this guy. He turned out to be everything I didn’t know I needed. He’s amazing, he knows what he wants and very much dominant in every way.

Here’s the thing, I’ve grown attached! Like, I cried my eyes out when he told me to delete his number. More on that later. We been talking on the phone almost everyday. We are both in the same position in our lives where we both given our hearts to our ex’s and we both very much love our ex partners but we are not enough for them, hence we both trying to move on.

However, we have had a few calls when we tried to have some intimate time over the phone but for some reason I can’t get him to cum/finish. I haven’t had this problem before but I’m inexperienced anyway like I only had one past relationship. My dirty talk is not doing it for him and I think it’s also that his heart is conflicted and he shared that he still wants his ex and still wants her back. But he calls me and say he wants me - in that way.

We both can’t seem to let each other go. My friend thinks he’s also attached as well. For instance, we got into an argument, we barely know each other but we argued for the first time. Both of us kept saying ‘bye’ to each other multiple times and longing out the argument.

The next day (after the argument) I sent him an apology note and wishing him all the best kinda thing. He responded with, I don’t want to waste my time (blah blah) delete my number, not interested thanks but no thanks Kinda thing. I cried! Like I was shocked at myself that I cried so hard. I don’t think I cried like this for my ex, that’s crazy! I barely know this person but he had already effected me this badly.

I replied a few hours later saying I don’t understand but okay, I respect your decision. He called me within that hour and he got a new number and everything. He said, I don’t know why I let you try with me. Then he proceeded to tell me about his ex and what happened between them. It’s very similar to what I’ve gone through expect he played the role I played in my relationship whereby both our respected partner weren’t committed enough to us. We spoke for ages. And he opened up that his mindset isn’t right and his heart is conflicted. I said he needs to figure out what he wants with his ex and his life. He said we can be friends and I said I don’t need a friend.

The next morning again, I get a call from him saying he wants me. I’m so confused. Like, I told him what are you doing to me, I’m so confused. For the rest of the day we didn’t talk until I messaged at night, more or less the first time I initiated something, he called me and we had a steamy conversation but it ended with him not able to cum/and him being frustrated and finishing without me off the phone. Why can’t I make him finish? I felt so used and angry that he’s playing with me like this. I messaged saying, clearly I’m not what you want or looking for, I think it’s best we call it a day. He responded straight away and said I think so too. It’ll end badly for us. I replied with as you wish. He then went to say, we can be friends but nothing else until either one of us finds someone and we can’t meet each other but only be pen pals but no intimacy or talk in this way. I asked do you just want to be friends? He said yes. Stupidly I agreed and said I can be your friend. I can’t seem to let him go, neither can he I don’t think.

But, I did say I can’t deal with heartbreak again, I can’t survive it if it happens. I did say this is your last chance to walk away, you can walk away from me and lll be okay. He called me straight away and said I called to say I want us to be friends. I said again clearly I can’t go through heartbreak I will leave to protect my heart if I have to. He replied protect it, always.

We left it at that and he called me in the morning, again talking about his ex and how she’s playing mind games. We spoke for an hour and before I went for work, he said I’m glad we are friends, I don’t have a lot of people to talk to.

Can someone explain what all of this means?! He knows I want him but he isn’t allowing anything to happen like meeting or letting go of his ex. I feel like I’m in this freaking love triangle. My heart is attached, I already said to him that there’s something about him I can’t let go.

Any advice is much appreciated. Also very sorry for lengthy message.