Repeat offender

Second time with GD. I am fed up at 29 weeks. I am crying and feel so depressed. I am petrified the baby will be huge- it feels huge! First growth scan next week and I really don't want to go. I will of course but I'd do anything to miss it. Partner was so supportive first time round, this time he comes home with junk food and encourages 'treats'. I weighed 9 stone 1 when I fell pregnant and I'm currently 10 stone & 1/2. I just wanted this one to be different, enjoyable, birth pool, no induction but it seems it'll be the same long stint in hospital and this time, away from my little man who still thinks the unbiblical cord is attached 😂 sorry, this is just a rant isnt it? I'm just really low today.