relationship vent 🥲

idk if it’s just my postpartum and i’m being extra dramatic but my relationship is in serious trouble and i’ve been holding stuff in for so long i feel like i’m going to explode so pretty much i’m gonna vent like crazy rn and post it and pls tell me if you have the patience to read this if i’m being dramatic or if this is really a problem.

i’m a stay at home mom to a 7 mo old. my man does not work currently but we do have rental properties that take care of us financially. so this means my husband is at home 24/7 but yet he doesn’t help me. i do every single diaper change, feeding, bath, night night time, house hold chores, pay bills etc. i was fine with doing this when he was working but now that he’s home mommy could use a BREAK. i can’t even shower or eat or do chores unless baby is napping because i don’t have any help.

he’s started to he incredibly short tempered and snappy. not that i feel unsafe i know he’d never hurt me physically he’s just mean and rude all the time he’s always got a shitty tone and an angry look on his face. i can ask the simplest question and he snaps at me which ofc i snap back because i’m also frustrated and in a bad mood atp. what bothers me most is that he’s doing it in front of people or when i’m on the phone with family or friends.

he does not give me the attention i want and need when he used to be super kind and caring and would pay super close attention to me all the time. not that i’m being an attention whore but when you’re a mom and you spend all day everyday changing diapers a little cuddle or telling me i’m beautiful or overhearing i wanted some candy and bringing it home GOES A LONG WAYYYY. we don’t even have sex hardly because “stress makes you have low libido” but when we do have sex it’s all about him.

his friends are number one to him. no matter what me and the baby are doing or need to do or how stressed and flustered and in need of help i am he will drop everything to go help a friend who calls. but there have been more times than i can count that WE needed help and we didn’t have a friend in sight. i had to cancel an orthodontist appointment because he didn’t want to go with me last week but rode with a friend to our body shop the same day cause “he didn’t know how to get there” like we don’t have gps right in our phones these days. going back to him treating me bad in front of people we went on vacay which a friend of his joined with his gf, and he was a huge dick to me the whole time. i pretty much was stuck in the car or bedroom because he doesn’t like me to feed our beast fed child in front of people. then the day we were supposed to check out the other couples room was trashed while ours was spotless and i asked them if they planned to clean up and they said “no that’s what we paid a cleaning fee for” but get this, they didn’t even pay for the airbnb we did. he never gave us the money to split. i ended up cleaning the whole airbnb. we hardly had a mess, and their room and bathroom was destroyed. covered in throw up, trash, food, drinks, dirty wet towels, and they even broke an autographed photo on the wall. my husband literally told them it was fine because i do this at him everyday at home anyways. and laughed and made jokes while i cleaned. and either baby napped or i held him while i cleaned up.

i’ve tried to say hey we need to talk later when specific stuff happens, but it’s ended up becoming a daily occurrence that i have to say we need to have a talk when babe goes to bed and he’ll either fall asleep or be on the phone or have a friend come over so we can’t talk.

i don’t see us lasting too much longer if stuff doesn’t change. again i’m not sure if i’m just extra emotional or if i need to get some balls and put my foot down and say we are talking about this right now. pls let me know what y’all think and if you feel like it what i even say because i don’t know how to even bring it up without just laying into his ass because it’s been a year of just bottling up and holding stuff in.