So I’ve been dating my bf for almost 2 years now and we’re getting a little more serious. The issue is that he has a smoking and gambling/scratchers addiction. I’m concerned with the amount of money he blows weekly as well as his overall health. He keeps saying he wants to quit but it looks like he’s taking no steps in the direction like getting on the patch or the nicotine gum or laxer treatment. I nag him about it every time I see him gambling and smoking and give him my spiel every time. It’s getting to the point where he’s trying to hide it from me. If we’re gonna be in a serious relationship I don’t want our finances to become an issue with the amount of waste. I also don’t want to be a widow when I’m 50.

I’m just wondering, would I be in the wrong to threaten leaving him if he doesn’t make an effort to stop? Would that be considered toxic and gaslighting?