Giving up hope

I'm starting to feel like baby #2 isnt gonna happen me and the boyfriend have charted took fertility meds and have tried so hard. My Bestie found out she was pregnant and didn't even want to be and my jealousy got in the way and well we haven't spoke in 2 months. The boyfriend and I split up for about two weeks and recently got back together and his ex just called and said she is pregnant and I just cried and cried. The jealousy I feel is so overwhelming. I can the mad since we weren't together but I want this so bad and I'm trying so hard to be a good person and not be jealous but its so incredibly hard. I think I'm bitter too lol. All of this is really depressing and I'm losing the will to try.