Waiting to test is killing me

I'm ttc #2 with my husband we have been trying for a while suffered a miscarriage in July and got right back to trying with no luck yet.... I'm hoping this month is the one! I'm trying to wait to test because that BFN is like a dagger to my heart ...but the waiting is killing me also I think after this if we haven't conceived I'm going to just stop trying the stress of it all is becoming too much to handle