What do you think?

Question

Super long post but its worth it I promise... I really need your opinion.

Im in love with my boyfriend but I dont think he feels the same way... he says he loves me back but for some reason I dont believe him...

We've been dating almost a year now. All i want every day and every minite is to be with him or talking to him on the phone. We talk on the phone once a day, any more and he thinks I'm being excessive... we have completely opposite schedules and live 40 mins away, but we've seemed to manage. I only see him once or twice a week now days. He used to do a lot for me and drive out to me, but recently ive been doing all the driving. When I ask him to come over he just complains and wants me to drive over there. Im 19 and still live at home and my family doesnt really help because they say they like him but when he comes over they act all weird and stand off ish. So now he hates my family.
Recently its been cold and rainy. So I'm in a cuddle mood. When I tell him that he just teases me and says I'm being really girly. And that kinda hurt my feelings. Because we dont really do stuff like that ever but sometimes I would like to be held. 
My bf has the best kisses but he says he doesnt like kissing me because he wants to keep them special... I try to understand.
A couple nights ago I got off work early and wanted to come over for a few hours. He said sure so I started driving. I was talking to him at the some time on my speaker of my car and he was saying how he wanted to see me in the morning to get breakfast but now we can't/dont have to. I told him I dont mind seeing him both days but he said it didnt matter..... I ONLY SEE HIM ONCE A WEEK and it doesnt matter... I threw a fit. I asked him if he really wanted me to come over that night or not and he just said he didnt care but now it was going to be awkward because I had just gotten mad at him... I hung up the phone. Turned around. I cried all the way home. Then cried myself to sleep.

I have always been a super chill girlfriend. Like I dont care what he does as long as hes not cheating on me. He just recently turned 21 so I want him to still live it up and have fun. I dont want to hold him back from any life expreieances.but shouldn't I be apart of that life more than one or two days a week?

He is the reason for my every insecurity... I am beautiful. I didnt think so for a while... but now every day. Every day. I have atleast two people (girls and guys. Old and young) telling me I'm gorgeous. Just random strangers. I have many agency's coming up to me for modeling info wanting me. Photographers wanting me for things. Advertisers. You name it.I turn them down because I want a normal life... But I never hear it from him.I feel I could never be perfect in his eyes. Hes always telling me I need to work out more for a better butt.. like why cant my ass be enough? I am a small chested curvy woman. Hes always complaining about my makeup and how I do it. I always change it up to find something he likes and nothing works. He still says I'm beautiful. But only when I ask why he never says it. I just feel unwanted and imperfect to him sometimes. Me and him have always been cool talking about other women. About thwir ass or boobs. But its starting to make me feel depressed because my ass isn't enough. He used to talk about how nice it was. Now its not good enough... 
 
I know he sounds terrible but I love him. Ive tried to talk to him about everything but he just gets upset that I think he could never do anything right for me. I dont know what to do. I just love him so much and dont want to loose him but part of me thinks it would be for the best...  
Or maybe in just being overly emotional and clingy.  Girls tell me what you think...

Answer

Girl live your life and dump the chump. You are young.. if you have modeling agencies left and right try it.. some girls never get a chance like that. Carpet Diem girl... take life by the balls. You are so young and could find some one better.

Answer

I'm sorry you're going through this. This might not be what you want to hear, but typically guys act their best when you're dating, behavior doesn't automatically improve when you get engaged or married. That being said (in my opinion), if you hate how he treats you sometimes and the way that you feel about yourself because of his behavior while you're dating him, things are probably always going to be like that in the future. I do believe people can change but why should you have to ask a guy to treat you how you want to be treated? Sounds like you guys have different expectations and love languages and your needs aren't being met. If he doesn't talk about it with you or listen, I'd say move on. It's hard, but I was in a similar situation and finally realized that I deserved better. A few months later I met my husband and I was almost overwhelmed with the fact that he was the one asking to see me all the time, complimenting me, etc.

Answer

The man your with shouldn't make you feel like that. 
You need to end the relationship. You're still young. There is definitely someone who will treat you much better! 
I didn't meet my Prince Charming until I was 23.

Answer

Honestly girl it sounds like you two are just on two different paths right now and although I'm sure it hurts to here you should probably break it off and Although it might not seem like it now, in the future you will look back and be grateful you didn't keep yourself in this relationship. Seems like he wants to be a little selfish and at 21, who could blame him. But you need to be selfish too. Your happiness should be your number 1 priority and you are 100% in charge of the way you feel, no one else. I had all these ups and downs too but I was so blessed to meet my soulmate at 24. He is the most amazing genuine man who tells me loves me all the time and why he does. He never gets comfortable and always makes sure he reminds me of what I mean to him. Those men do exists and it's more than OKAY to be told you're beautiful and loved everyday! Find your happiness first!

Answer

I know it's hard but if you're unhappy, find your happiness elsewhere as far as guys. Go have fun tonight for New Years. If he's being boring and won't drive to see you this time, get all glammed up and go out with your girl friends. Don't let someone else hold you back. You deserve better. Good luck!

Answer

40 minutes is a fairly significant distance to live apart. It's enough so that it makes it difficult to see the other person everyday. 
From the sounds of it you two may just be really different in how you express your feelings and emotions. I'm not saying you're completely incompatible but you could definitely find a guy who expresses himself more in the way you understand. There are plenty of guys who absolutely love to cuddle and can't get enough of your kisses. From what you describe, although I believe you love your current boyfriend, you may want to consider finding a man who really satisfied your needs better. A guy like you want is out there! People can change themselves if they want but you can't change other people. By that I mean you can change to accept him the way that he is and the fact that he doesn't express his love the way you want him to but you can't force him to change the way he expresses himself. Something to think about. Good luck!

Answer

I had these issues with my bf. We've managed to make it work for 3 yrs. but he is older so when I was 19 he was 22 and went out a lot. And I'd get mad. He may be feeling different. But I would ask mine why we don't cuddle anymore and so on and so fourth, he responded because we didn't need to all the time. Then I realized, he was right we don't need to cuddle or call me beautiful daily just to know we love each other, he is a lot better and compliments me more even though I don't need to be complimented. If he can't tAlk to you civilly about your feelings and what bothers you, he may be a waste of time honey, simply because he should take your feelings and wants into consideration. Your not asking him to change because you can't do that. But he needs to decide what he wants you for you. Or some tight perky assed girl. I find it  very disrespectful when my man makes comments on other females because I respect him not to do the same.

Answer

I'd draw the line at someone who only wants to "kiss when it's special." I could honestly go without sex for the rest of my life so long as making out was still an option. I love kissing. I'd be furious!

Seriously. It sounds like he's just gotten comfortable in routine and likes having things done his way. I wouldn't stand for that.

My bf & I have different love languages (if you're not familiar with that concept, Google it! It'll teach you a few neat things!) but I've sat him down and told him specifically what I need. He's been receptive to my demands, lol, and that's what you want: someone who listens to what you need and is willing to step outside their comfort zone for you. My guy isn't much of a romantic, but he snuggles with me every day and occasionally brings me flowers because he likes to see me smile.

You want a guy who adores you and will do just about anything to see you smile. And who will kiss you any time of the day or night, because you're beautiful and you grace him with your presence, not "I guess you can come over, it doesn't really matter."

I think you're unhappy because you know somewhere in the back of your mind that you deserve better and can have better. So the real question is, when are you going to tell him that, go your own way, and find better?! Get it girl!  😊

Answer

Thank you everyone for your responses!  :) they are all so helpful and supportive 😚💕😃

Answer

You are young my dear. I know being in love with him may be the greatest but honestly if he has a set of rules about seeing each other or kissing only when he thinks it's special. Come on girl take a deep breath and let him go. Maybe he will realize what an amazing woman you are. But for now he is seeing that being in a relationship differently than the way you see it. But it is your choice and we can't tell you what to do. Whatever choice or direction you go. Know your worth and live life. True love happens when you least expect it. Good luck pretty girl.

What do you think?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey