Missing my little bean

Christine • Rainbow baby boy born January 2017 🌈 after a missed miscarriage Dec`14, molar pregnancy Apr`15 and blighted ovum Feb'16
Tonight i found a box of whole wheat crackers i got hooked on while pregnant, hidden way in the back of the pantry. It has been 6 weeks since it happened and i thought i was feeling better, i've been trying to think only of the happy moments and our short lived joy. The crackers just brought back memories, i remembered i was hungry all the time and that everything i ate i was thinking of him/her. I used to eat those crackers for my little bean, they were for him. 
I just can't help but wish he was still here. I'm so sad. :'(