It is Gods plan or just you grasping for answers?
I have a few things that I've been needing advice on. I don't have any Godly woman in my life that know I'm TTC. I don't know if anyone else thinks about this or is struggling with this. My husband and I have been TTC for 16 months now. I fully believe that God has perfect timing and a plan for us. It'll happen when he wants it to happen and not a moment sooner or a moment later. I do still struggle with things like why is it happening for everyone else and how long is it going to take?! I wonder if God's plan for us is no children etc. We haven't went to the doctors because frankly, it will happen when God wants it to, if at all. I struggle with jumping to conclusions and the medical world vs God's timing. I have been thinking about adoption lately. I wonder if it is me desperately coming up with the idea or God putting it there. How do I know? I know I want children and I would love to carry my own biological children. But I just want to start a family. When is waiting for God to give us a pregnancy vs God moving us on to the adoption topic supposed to happen? I worry about it being my idea and then God giving us a pregnancy. I want adoption to be my last resort but what if it's Gods plan? I don't want to rush ahead with things and be desperately pulling out other options when it may not be His doing. I know that I must keep praying and he will push me where I want to but I just don't want it to be me pushing where I think I should go. And I know that maybe we should go get tests done and see if they find anything wrong but it's hard for me because when do you say that I have these problems because God is using his perfect timing and I'm going to take drugs etc that may not work because it's not time for him to give us a baby yet? Am I rambling or is anyone actually understanding? This took a little courage to post.