How do you start THAT conversation?

Question

I really don't know what to call it, but how do you talk to a guy about how far you're willing to go? I'm 17 and don't have much experience with relationships or even kissing for that matter. I'm a virgin and plan on remaining one until I get married (he knows that) but he has had sex with multiple girls, so how do I tell him just how much he CAN do/touch? Also, we're not actually in an official relationship and I don't know if we ever will be, which I feel like that would make it even more weird?

Answer

You do not have to do anything with him that you don't want to. Say that to yourself any time you doubt yourself. 
Tell him exactly what is allowed and what is not. You don't have to cater to what he would want or what you think he would like.

If he does not respect that, don't talk to him and certainly don't become "official".

Answer

I'm pretty much in the same exact position that you're in. When I had the conversation with my (I guess I'll just call him my boyfriend, but it's not official) boyfriend I flat out told him that I'm not having sex until I'm married and if that's what he wants he can go get a different girl. I just told him that I'm ok with kissing and making out but I wanted to wait until I got more comfortable with him for anything else. He's extremely respectful and we didn't kiss for the first 8 months of our "relationship." The asks before he does anything at all, even if he bumps my boob he apologizes and asks if I'm alright. So you just have to tell him where you definitely don't want to go until marriage and what you want to wait until you're more comfortable with him. And it's ok if he asks to do something and you say you're not ready. Don't be afraid to say no. The first time I said I wasn't ready for something I cried because I felt like I let him down but he was completely fine with it and I just overreacted.

Answer

Just talk to him. If you're willing to do anything with him, you should be able to have a conversation about it so it's more comfortable. If it's awkward, you can do it over text. Just make clear boundaries and ask him about his. That's what I did since I intend on keep my virginity until marriage. It's really not awkward, what's awkward is having to tell him to stop during a moment he thought was ok.

Answer

Just be straight up with him. Tell him what he can and can't do. And if he can't accept that then he shouldn't be having sex in the first place and he's still just a little boy.

How do you start THAT conversation?

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