Custody rights ...

I want a divorce but I am a stay at home mom. My husband is verbally abusive and can be physically . He breaks things throws things has put his hands on me. He has had substance issues for years but hides it well. He is a decent dad goes to work takes our 2 year old outside but when he's on a streak it's hell living with him. He conatantly calls me lazy if tge house isnt to his liking. He almoat daily tells me to get a job . I have to ask to spend money. I never buy myself anything and havent had a hair cut in almost a year. When i get my hair cut i hear about it for weeks. He constantly records our conversation like for example we were arguing he was cussing me i had enough and was yelling for him to leaeve me alone. Which i feel bad about. He starts saying look how your acting ( all while re cording) then i was bathing my son , he was throwing a fit and tired didnt want a bath and my huaband comes in witg recorder and says what is wrong with him. ( meanwhile he never baths him) he will sneak up on me and my daughter and record ua talking. He has hidsen in the bathroom of my bedroom and listened to mine and my daughters conversations. Hes crazy. It. not that i dont want to work ita just daycare is so expensive and there are not that many good paying jobs if you dont have a degree. I am in school online. I bust my butt around the house. I am constantly doing for my 2 and 12 year old. I feel like i live on eggshells. He threatens that if I leave he will get custody because I have no income.i don't want my kids going with him for days at a time. I am looking for work. I want to move in with my mom but I don't know if I should.