Dang you AF

So upset.... After my miscarriage a couple months ago we decided to try again... We followed all the suggestions and rules and did everything right; I stopped taking all medications and stuck to only prenatals... And yesterday 1 dang day early af came to visit and with that first flow of red my heart dropped....  Very discouraged....
I've been blessed with an amazing child already and feel guilty to be sad when some of you are trying for your first.  I understand the pain now - since my son I've had 2 miscarriages and this last miscarriage in August ripped my heart out since I actually held the fetus in my hand - although it looks like nothing to me that was everything and so painful....  I'm almost afraid; like my son is our miracle child but I refuse to give up hope... After this cycle we will try again, I will research more and try everything I can.
Baby dust to all you who are in the same boat as me and all of you who are anxiously awaiting those 2 lines this month. 
Love & Prayers from my family to all yours.