Rainbow baby !

I can not describe the absolute joy I feel right now, but when that test first came up positive I was terrified ! I worried.....I paced my house in tears and I missed my baby that I lost just 7 months ago . I was a terrible grouch and nearly ripped my poor husbands head off numerous times ( verbally) . I hugged my 5 year old much tighter than normal and hoped that this time we would actually be able to tell her that she will have the sibling she has been belly aching for. Until I realized that this isn't going to go exactly like last time and I might actually be safe this time could I really let loose and be happy . If this baby does make it do I want to look back and think about the stress I put my self through for nothing ? I am taking one day at a time and thanking God for every teeny tiny second that I get to carry this precious little bean . I am finally able to feel happy for the first time in 7 months . I swear to my self that no matter the out come I will be happy until the moment something happens because I can't control what will happen .