he blew up last night because I got upset that he had already had 4 before he left for work, told me that he's going to a party this weekend and not to expect him home that night, and then proceeded to pour another drink. He doesn't understand that I feel completely abandoned right now, im having issues with depression and am generally terrified about this baby. He's just proving to me now that he alcohol is a genuine problem. 

I dumped out the rest of the bottle last night and he stormed off furious about the cost (despite the fact that I have paid all of our bills, groceries, expenses, and for the baby stuff for the past three months). 

I just don't know what to do. Can't stop crying, having a panic attack and it seems to be causing more BH. I'm worried about baby, and worried about me.