Feeling hated

Ever since we lost the baby i feel like my husband hates me like he blames me even though he says he doesnt he yells at me more and gets upset and mad at me when im depressed this is my fourth miscarriage , third with him ive given him a two year old and four month old twins all girls but he wants a boy so bad i can taste it i just dont want to be broken and not able to give him a boy years down the road and i dont want him to give up and leave me he probably wont but its feelings im having 😢