Rocky Road

I've been with my bf for one year, and lately its been pretty bad in my opinion. Ok debt, I have been in 800 dollars of debt for about a year now because I decided to get a credit card for festival travels last summer. I pay off little and use it again. Since I tell my boyfriend everything, he always seems to bring it up because it upsets him that I am not financially responsible. I am between jobs, and I don't earn nearly enough because of other bills. He says I am not wife material yet, and fears that I am not grown up yet. Mind you he's a year younger than me and I am 19. Its mostly my financial problems that really upsets him, often calling me "sstupid, and childish"

I also cry so much now. I have never cried for no man ever, and I cry for every little thing. Its so unnecessary. I just often times feel sad and I cry. To my bf he says its been over used and often when I cry he doesn't even care.

I also get mad often :/

Fast forward. Lately I feel unwanted. Or not special. Mind you I tell him! All the time! And he says he feels like that all the time. I wonder why because I tell him I appreciate him and thank him- WHAT DO I DO TO MAKE HIM FEEL APPRECIATED??? How do I treat him like he deserves? He says that he treats me how he does because I treat him bad. But I don't know what I do wrong. I need help and I don't know who to turn to. All my friends tell me is to break up with him but I can't. I don't feel like is an option because I love him. I'm often saying negative things because I have to be realistic and he gets mad at me for being so negative about our relationship.

Idk what to do guys. Sorry its so long.