Anyone else ever go through this?!!

I was in a really long relationship for about 10 years from when I was 14 to 24! I also got pregnant at 16 so kind of had no choice but to stay with him. We haven't been together for two years and when we split up I pretty much met someone straight away, at first it was just talking and texting all day long then we finally slept together. I was on birth control at the time and I fell pregnant to him 5 months into our relationship. I actually wouldn't even call it a relationship as we never discussed what we were. He was also besties with my brother so we had to keep it a secret for a long time. At first it was amazing and enjoyed it and the sex and this and that, I've now got my one year old. I feel like I miss those times as the beginning of the relationship when you get butterflies, and your getting.to know someone and they're giving you so much attention. Also just the feeling of having guys interested in me as well? I don't know if it's a self esteem thing but my guy does pay me a lot of attention and he is extremely touchy and affectionate ( I on the other hand am not) he's always calling me babe and honey and let's me know how beautiful I am often etc, but it's just that feeling I can't shake. We have sex almost every night but it's like is this all it is? I want to talk to him about it but really don't want him to think he's not good enough. He doesn't last very long in bed but I always orgasm, I dunno I have only slept with three guys being my current BF, my ex and the guy I lost my virginity to (I was 15 & he passed away not long after) anyway so it's more of wanting to explore and be with other people? I wasn't planning on it but I kind of settled into another long term relationshipship right after my previous 10 year one and never got the chance to enjoy being single and it's effecting me now. I love my BF he's amazing but I'm just lost right now. I'm happy or I think I'm happy but what are these feelings?? I feel horribly guilty about it.