Insecurities

I'm 15 years old, and I think this is the most insecure I've been about my face/looks in my whole life. I never leave the house without makeup, and I'm reluctant to even be around my own family without my eyebrows done and eyeliner winged. I'm terrified for the day that I'm going to have to show my future boyfriend or husband my face without makeup because I am at the point where I don't even want to look in the mirror if I'm not wearing makeup. I don't want to go swimming or do anything that could involve messing up/taking off my makeup. I used to love swimming and be perfectly happy going to the pool or beach with my friends. Now the idea of that terrifies me. I feel like my self esteem is at an all time low for myself. I need advice. Summer's coming soon and I've invested most of my time trying to find the best waterproof makeup because I'm just so scared about being in public without makeup. Maybe I'm just an insecure teenage girl who wants to look and feel pretty all the time. Maybe this is selfish. I would just love some advice. I don't take selfies (with or without makeup) because I just can't look past the imperfections on my face. Is this just me? Can anyone help me out here? Thank you all so much 💖