I love my mom dearly, but she's done a lot of bad thing to me. I'm constantly trying to convince myself that she loves me and cares about me because I have this resentment I can't let go. I was very emotionally neglected as a child and throughout adolescence, but my mom within the last year has become a kinder, wiser, and a more patient person. It really hurt on a family trip a few months ago because I watched her comfort my cousin (a year older than me. I'm 20 btw) and it tore me up inside because she's never once comforted me for similar things. My cousin deserved to be comforted. I know that. I love her but for some reason I had to excuse myself while I took a walk an cried for about an hour. And my mom spends time with my cousin a lot. They went to NY last year together and my mom is always taking her places. I found out that my mom got a Disneyland yearly pass with my cousin and her little brother. I live 20 mins away from Disneyland while they are over an hour and a half away. So about the 5th time they went this year, I asked if I could come along because I don't have school on Fridays and they always go on Friday. She said she would get back to me but she never did. I found out from my dad that she went anyway. That was about a month ago. Today she asked me if I wanted to go with them in a few days for my "birthday treat" since my birthday is at the end of the month. I'm very hurt by it and I just need advice. We don't have problems with money or anything but even so, I would have payed myself to go with them. I just need an outsiders opinion. Please don't be mean or belittle my feelings. I went through a lot as a kid and I have a lot of mental issues now because of it. It's hard for me to see clearly with this hurt. By the way, it's not about disneyland. I just want my mom to want to spend time with me. And I want to do things with my mom and cousin too.