Feeling ready to just give up

This whole TTC thing is really getting to me each time every ending of my cycle. I get my hopes up expecting this month to be my month, when AF just shows her ugly face. Like im truly starting to feel I am suppose to only have one child, and just be happy with that. Me and my SO have been trying so hard, I even went out my way to get extra stuff to help me conceive with no luck. I honestly just want to stay home and cry in my bed every night because I am starting to feel it is my fault. Im about to just delete all the apps, throw the basal body  thermometer out the window, and trash all the vitamins. Im so fed the hell up, with my son it happened like nothing. It wasnt even planned, now that I am actually trying to plan it, its like god wants me to not get what I want. I feel myself getting into a deep dark hole of depression like I did not too long ago, I'm over being disappointed...