Conflicted

Hi I'm Rumbi i'm 17 turning 18 have been in a relationship with the same guy for three years yes I know it's crazy but that's been us him and I. Some people aren't going to agree with me and are probably going to tell me I don't know what love is but I'll say it anyways I love this boy seeing him happy and seeing him do what makes him happy makes me happy. There's just one problem though our relationship is pretty much long distance most of the time and he gets mad about it which I totally understand, but what I don't understand is how he gets mad at me like I control what goes on. Sometimes I feel like I'm still with him cause it's safe being with him has become the norm for me and I'm afraid to be on my own but I don't want to be that girl. Yes I do love him but I want to be able to love myself even more and be good on my own and not take some of the trouble he brings my way.... Please help x.