I always planned to breastfeed Emmett, I assumed it would be a natural thing for us. It wasn't. It was grueling and frustrating and he just couldn't properly latch. It took us months to get it right. Lactation consultants, pediatricians, nurses manually putting my breast in Emmett's mouth and still it was a struggle. I felt like a failure, especially when they suggested that I supplement with formula because he was (is) small. Once he was about 4 months old he finally had a good strong latch. Those first 4 months were heartbreaking, he would cry and arch his back and struggle and I would do my best to guide him, tears streaming down my cheeks the entire time. I wanted to give up several times, but here we are 7 months in and we are now able to enjoy that bond together. I'm glad that I stuck with it because I love that bond that we have. The photo is him at 2 months old during a rare successful bf session.