Went in for a doctor's appointment. Which was supposed to be my last "high risk" appointment. (I've had to be seeing a high risk doctor every 2 weeks, separately from my "regular" primary OB doctor that i see every 4 weeks).

So i went in to my appointment, (at 24 weeks) which was supposed to be my last with them, of if everything looked good.. meaning: my cervix was still long (ive lost 3 babies due to short/soft cervix), and also if my baby boy was measuring up to date (which wasnt a concern, but the doctor just wanted to measure, before he didnt see me again), amd then lastly, if ive gained weight (i was supposed to have gained atleat 15 lbs by then, but have only gained 3 lbs)

So anyway.. I go in, with a great attitude, and positive energy, i get checked. And ived gained 5 more lbs (which wasnt much, but the doctor was happy with the results). Then they check my cervix, which was still long, and strong (YAY!). Then lastly they measure the baby.. they told me he is measuring small for how far i was, and therefore i would have to be seen again in 6 weeks from then to check if the baby has grown significantly, or not.. and if not, the doctor will have to start considering the options (which is to have me induced, to deliver the baby early).

My appointment was at 24 weeks, i am now 28 weeks.. and go in on 2 weeks to measure the baby.. i have been completely freaking out, seeming as how ive lost 3 babies, and im so close to finally being able to start my family.. yet here i am slapped with bad news. Im so scared. Am i in control of how much the baby grows? Or is that all him? If i eat alot, will it make him grow more? Did i do something wrong in my pregnancy? I thought i was doing everything by the books, following all the rules and myths.. until now, i was freaking out, im just so scared to be induced early, and something be wrong...

Please keep me and my baby boy Ayden in your thoughts.. and hopefully when i go in on the 23rd, for my next appointment, ill get good news.. 😣