Would you leave or stay?

Question

So im raising my stepdaughter as my own. She will be 4 in December. I have had her since she was 1. She doesnt even know im not her real mother. I have a daughter with her dad who will 4 months in 2 weeks. 
My stepdaughters biomom abandoned her and doesnt see her, send her money, knows nothing about her daughter. She texts every 4/5 months to flirt with my husband. Ive voiced my opinions to him multiple times and nothing ever changes. 
His family constantly tells me that im not her real mom, that they have more rights than me because they are her blood. My husband does nothing to defend me at all. 
We are in FL and are currently in the hurricane matthew. Her biomom hasnt actually spoken to my baby in over a yr. she has the nerve to text now, TEXT, "tell catalina mommy lives her so much. Keep her safe."  My blood is BOILINGGGG because it takes a category 4 hurricane, natural disaster for u to acknowledge your FUCKING CHILD?!?!?!! And she gets away with everything. Like how tf donu have a child and just dont care about her? Not to mention she has 3 child that she gave all away. She only cares about her money. 
What irritates me is that she gets away wih it and can still get the respect from my husband family because shes supposedly her "blood." 
Am i just wasting my time? Should I just deal with it or should I just walk away? Advice? Any stepmoms out there suffering what im going thru????

Answer

I would suggest, make it legal. Adopt her, given that you are such a good soul. Make it clear to your husband and his family that if you are going to raise her, you need it to do it all right and they should stop making insensitive comments else her 'blood' relations can take care of her. She can grow up and decide who she wants to consider MOM and others can have their opinions to themselves.
Either ways you make peace with it and keep doing what you feel is right. I respect you!

Answer

Voice your concern with your husband regarding his family. That's not at all okay. You are an amazing person to have taken that little girl in as your own, and considering the time you've known her and her age, leaving at this point would ultimately hurt that child. I say try and stick it out, make sure your concerns have been heard by your husband and let him know how this all makes you feel. If you still feel the same in six months, then its time for you to go. Its a beautiful idea for you to be that step parent, but its a tough job and if you can't be that person anymore- that's okay too. You need to be thought about as well as your feelings do count. *hugs , hope this all gets resolved for your sake mama!

Answer

Don't let other people's bad life choices influence you to walk away. That little girl that you have raised as your own is so worth the fight!

Answer

I'd rip my husband a new one if he wasn't sticking up for me. We're in a similar situation. My oldest daughter just turned 4 and technically I'm her step mom. Her bio mom comes around once in a while but has never paid a penny in child support (she's 3 years behind) and generally doesn't give a shit about her. She keeps having kids with different men and they keep getting taken from her because she's proven time and time again that she's not meant to be a mother. She's currently 7 months pregnant and still smokes like a train. My youngest daughter (and my only biological child) is 6 months old and loves her big sister so much. But no matter what you should stay and fight because in that little girls eyes you are her mother and she trusts you to always be there when she needs you. Its about her now

Answer

That's your child! anybody can be a parent. You take care of her, you teach her, you are what she knows don't let anyone break that bond. You are her mother, fight for your child! Don't abandon her like her egg donor did.. Good luck ❤☺

Answer

Let me start by saying you are a blessing in that child's life. You are doing what a lot of women won't do. Your hubby definitely needs to put his foot down with his family. Just cuz you are not blood related doesn't mean a damned thing if you are the one raising that child. She knows you as mommy. I don't know what the situation is with the bio mom but either way his family shouldn't be meddling if they see that you are raising that child like your own blood related child. They should be more appreciative.

I'm so sorry  you are going through this and wish you lots of luck!! 😌

Answer

Take the mom to Court and try to get her rights she don't deserve them who abandons a kid than think it's ok to pop up years later or months at a time not cool unless she did drugs no excuse

Answer

In one of the comments u said u want to adopt her but your husband won't let u bc it will hurt the bm 😡😳🤔. I'm not understanding why anyone him or his family gives a damn about her feelings. She's a dead beat who only sends text messages which a 3yr old can't read so the conversation isn't meant for her. It seems to me like she's only trying to make her presence known to u and ur husband and not to the child she created. If your daughter saw her would she even know who she was? I say stay and try to stick it out for the time being, I would hate for your daughter to feel disregarded by another women when u are obviously trying and putting ur heart and soul into this. I say keep talking to ur husband about adopting her, u r the only mother she has and that should be made permanent. If the situation doesn't get better within 6mths to a yr the re-evaluate ur options. You're and an in disguise and if your husband and his family don't notice this they will if/when you back away. God has blessed u with a beautiful heart.

Answer

Think
About the little girl that loves you, stay strong and try to work it out

Answer

Stay and talk with your so about adopting or something. Definitely something that can be done in some states. But he needs to step in and say something to his family about their behavior. You've raised that girl as your own. And as long as she thinks you're mom and calls you mom, then you are mom. Just because someone is blood doesn't make them a good parent, or even a parent at all for that matter. Talk with that man of yours about how you're feeling and if he doesn't say or do something about it then he doesn't care how his family acts towards you.

Would you leave or stay?

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey