Ingrown hairs

Ok so let's start out with this, I have a gross amount of ingrown hair around my public area, and also a lot of scar tissue from obsessively picking at it. if you didn't really know what herpes looked like, you would probably assume by looking at me that I might have it, like it is not good looking at all. My boyfriend, bless him, prefers the natural look, so I don't really have to worry about preventing them anymore, I just want to get rid of the ones I have, and all the red marks. help??