Military Families?

Question

So my boyfriend/fiancé will be heading into basic training for the army in June of 2017. We planned on getting married after he was finished in August. I have horses which are my life and plans of having children and this amazing life with an amazing husband and my dream job that I'm in school for as a vet technician..... I love this man to death but I am terrified that I will have to give up on being happy. The fear of him coming home, the long drawn out periods with no communication. If my children will have their father around enough to experience precious moments. The fact I can't bring my horses with me with all the relocating. And the fear that he will be affected mentally and come home a complete stranger... I do not know what to do at this point. Does anyone out there have some advice?

Answer

My fiancé is in the military. He's active right now so he goes on year long deployments. The thing is, you don't have to relocate if you don't want to. You don't have to live on base or follow him wherever he goes. He gets leave so he'll be able to see you when he can. I won't lie to you it's extremely hard I cry every time he leaves for the first week and I have this huge teddy bear he gave me and I hug it kiss it and cuddle with it. And as for kids, we don't have any at the moment, but we're trying for one. And I will make sure that kid knows it's dad. Dad is a hero and he's out there being amazing and he loves them more than the world.

Answer

Just the thought of u giving up what u love and what u planned should be clear enough that u have to take ur time while he's on training and make ur decision. I'm a navy wife, I gave up everything when my husband convinced me to move in with him here in Ventura, California. I'm from Manila by the way, so its like half way around the world lol! Deployments isn't really difficult for me cause my husband always asks me to meet him at every port the ship will dock in to, so he provides me money to buy flight tickets and book the hotels and stuffs so we could tour that country together while he's on 3 to 5 days liberty. Cause hey, we're both still young and its still just the 2 of us, no babies yet! Really depends on ur husband and he would insist to do that. However, once in awhile I still feel sad cause I miss my parents, pets and friends so much! But my husband is so amazing that when he get enough leave days and saved enough money, he wouldn't hesitate to buy us ticket to visit everyone in Manila! I suggest that u have a conversation with ur fiancé about it, he should understand what's important to u and u guys will eventually end up with a decision. Just take it easy u guys, and good luck!

Answer

It's always a scary thing. There is a lot you will be putting aside to follow his career but you just need to determine what is best for you and what you feel is worth leaving. You can't predict what will happen in the future. I hope he never has to experience any traumatic event but if it does happen there are things out there to help with the situation. Your children will still have time with their father. Even though there is a lot of time away from family there is still time together. You'll get use to it and you'd get use to having to run the household alone until he returns. It's not all easy and you give up a lot but in the end I wouldn't change it. My husband is an amazing man and even though this life can throw us in a lot of different directions we are very happy. However, I don't have as high of a worry of combat fighting while my husband is on deployment because he's in the navy. My brother was in the army and it was something I always feared. He suffered from PTSD and had some hard times but was able to overcome them with time. They are never completely the same but the military can make them a better person too. Wish you the best!

Military Families?

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