I'm fucked up

Seriously, what the fuck do I do? I can't stand up to men. Dad used to beat us n I can't ever seem to raise my voice or say no. Guy in high school I dated forced me to blow him, guy in college had sex with me (is it rape if I didn't say yes but also didn't say stop?), boss at worked groped my ass today.

What does my bf see in me? I let my boss touch my ass, didn't even say not to do it again, I just felt like puking. I just want men to stop touching me (except bf, he's an angel)