Been ttc for two years, with one miscarriage at the start, and haven't gotten pregnant since. Husband was just diagnosed as a diabetic and affects fertility. Hopefully with his blood sugars in normal range we might have a chance. Which I kinda was hoping for this month. Af hasn't showed yet but one vvvfl and bfn since I'm guessing I'm out. His cousin just announced that they're pregnant. Just about everyone I know is pregnant it feels like...and I can't be happy for them. They get pregnant on acciedent and I want a baby on purpose...I've kept these thoughts away for months but they're coming back. I just don't want to feel down all the time again.