Am I Wrong? 🤔

Question

I just wanted to know if I am wrong for feeling this way. Im not trying to be petty or anything. I just want advice. PLEASE no rude comments.

My boyfriend has a 6 almost 7 year old daughter. We recently had my first a now 3 week old baby girl . My 3 week old cant sleep unless you hold her to your chest until she is fully out and then lay her down. He dosent agree with me doing this and last night made me let her cry like screaming bloody murder crying and got upset with me when I took her and held her and he didnt want to listen when I told him my midwife said she cant soothe herself this early. But yet his 7 year old daughter is so used to sleeping with her mom when she is home that she will cry when no one sleeps with her every night or cries to sleep in our bed when she is over on weekends.

To the point:
Am I wrong for feeling some type of way that he would baby his crying 7 year old and not even bother tying to pick up our 3 week old to calm her down and tells her (when she cant even understand) that he dosent care if she cries and that she is just going to have to cry?

Answer

Perhaps his 7 year old being so needy is what prompts him to not want you to do this. Not saying he's right, because when they're that little, letting them cry literally does nothing for you or the baby.. But perhaps his spoiled 7 year old is why he wants to do things differently with your new child.

Answer

I would never let my newborn baby cry like that. He needs to respect the way you want to take care of your daughter and not compare to his first child. You're never in the wrong to feel the way you feel, no matter what it is the situation. If you're feeling something it's legit and no one can tell you you shouldn't fee that way. He needs to do better than that. Do not let him tell you to go against your mother instincts. He doesn't know. As much as he loves your baby girl, you're the one who grew her inside of your womb, delivered her to this world and feed her with your bodily fluids (assuming you breastfeed her).

Answer

No. I always followed three steps when putting my new babies to sleep. Eat, swaddle, and vibrate. (Her bassinet had a vibration mode that would shut off on a timer,) if she cried more than 5 minutes, I would go soothe her. Babies that little cry continuously for a reason. And they don't stop till the need has been fulfilled.

Answer

No he's definitely wrong. A 3 week old shouldn't be made to cry like that, they need to be soothed when they're crying. It can be frustrating and exhausting, but that's a part of parenthood we all sign up for. My son was really colicky his first 6 weeks and was next to impossible to put down on his own. It was a struggle, but he needed to be held and cottled as a newborn.

Am I Wrong? 🤔

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