Ex boyfriend has a child?

Question

A couple of months ago, my ex boyfriend got in contact with me. We were dating in our late teens, and I had strong feelings for him. I broke it off because he smoked weed and I was afraid of what my parents thought, but now I smoke.

Since we broke up, he had a child and is no longer with her mother. I still feel like I have feelings for him. I'm 22, he's 24. I just don't know if him having a child would make things more complicated. Please help. We are no longer in contact because I'm in a relationship that I'm not happy in. I feel tied down and I find myself thinking of him often. I've been with my boyfriend for three years, we have pets together that I couldn't take if we broke up that I love to death.

What should I do? :(

Answer

Well you can't stay in a bad relationship for the pets ... some people end up doing "joint custody" after a breakup and maybe you can do the same. I'd end things with the guy you're not satisfied with, then once you're free see if your feelings remain for the ex. You need to keep these two issues separate.

Answer

Well this is pretty similar to my now relationship! I met my SO when she was 18 and we started dating, we were so in love but he is 5 years older than me! I ended moving away for school and just so happens my brother was roommates with my SO close high school buddies! Well that friend told my brother that I was dating an old guy and there was just so much drama, plus I wanted to live my college life.. so my SO and I broke up... well he had another relationship and ended up having a child, but they broke up.. we got back in contact with each other after I moved back to Dallas and the rest is history... we're engaged with a baby on the way (Due in April 🙂) and I now have a step daughter! Now, at first I knew that I loved him so much that I was willing to be down for whatever (him having a 10 month old)... but let me tell you, 2.5 years later, you can't prepare yourself for the responsibility and maturity it takes to be with someone that has a child! It's tough work & you might feel a little out of control with different situations bc it's not just you and that person... you're taking in a child too.. you have to be strong and loving. I love my stepdaughter, but I do often think about how amazing it would be to have all of our "first times" together & having a baby isn't one of them.. you will have to deal with a baby's mom & you won't be able to be as spontaneous as you would like, bc you may have the child with you... you can't just pack up and go on adventures... that part sucks, but I wouldn't trade my life for the world... so it depends on you... being with someone who has a child is tough work!

Answer

Nope. He's in the past for a reason. You're too young to tie yourself up with someone you used to be with and their kid. You can easily find someone single and childless. Set yourself up for success. Stepparenting isn't for the faint of heart and it often negatively impacts relationships.

Ex boyfriend has a child?

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey