Losing My Virginity I guess

So I met up with this guy I was sort of seeing yesterday and we had sex or tried to. I don't know if it counts if it wasn't fun... It went in to the point where I was bleeding, but his penis was really big and he was as understanding as he could be but he left mad, I'm lucky he wasn't mean or anything but I still feel shitty about it. But surprisingly the biggest thing that is bothering me is that I don't feel any different, like I thought after doing it I would be happy or relieved but I don't even know what sex is defined as, like does it mean when the penis breaks my hymen or it going in all the way or just a good sexual experience. It was excruciating which sucks because I am the least prudish person I want to have sex/good sex but I can't tell if it because the first time or because I'm always just going to have this pain. It been 24 hours now and it still feels like I tore my vagina. I guess I'm just looking for some support here, I don't have anyone else that I can talk with about this.