diagnosed with HSV1

For a year and a half I had continuous sores appearing in my nose every month or so. After 2 weeks of applying a cream it would go away. Same spot every single time. Doctors never swabbed it the entire time they just told me it was a staph infection and gave me a cream. A month ago I was fed up and insisted my doctor swabbed it and I tested positive for hsv1 in my nose. I feel like my life is ruined. Genuinely. Sounds silly but I now have herpes and I don't even know how I got it. I'm thankful it's not genital but the virus is contagious even when it's dormant. So if I kiss anyone, share a drink, I can give them the virus because it is constantly shedding. I've given it to my boyfriend by accident. (I kissed him during my very first day of my first outbreak not knowing what it was, and he got it above his lip) please, someone shed some light on this. I genuinely am depressed. I now take valacyclovir every day to prevent outbreaks and it's absolutely drying my skin and eyes out so bad. Ugh.