Alcoholic Father
So I'm 22 and I'm still living at home with my parents while I save money. My mother has lupus and depression. She won't admit that she's depressed because she doesn't think of herself as "that kind of person". Most days she'll sit in the recliner with our dog and watch TV all day. Our house has always been messy, mostly being my moms fault because she can't finish a project to save her life. Lately, it's not only messy but it's dirty. Dust balls on the floor, crumbs, etc. It makes my dad and I very uneasy because who wants to come home to a gross house after working 12 hours?
My dad always been drinking but in the past three years it's been really bad. My first year in college he had too much to drink one night and my parents got into an argument. My mom has learned not to engage with him when he's like that so she went to bed. He started going after her and pulling at her pajamas and trying to grab her. He lost balance and fell backward into their tv. My mom got dressed and was about to leave to go to my uncles (he's about 6'3", 300 pounds of solid muscle AND a cop) when my dad begged her not to go. I called my boyfriend at the time to come get me because there was no way I was going to sleep in the house that night. My dad figured out I was gone, called me, and threaten to report to the police that my boyfriend had kidnapped me if I did not come home. My boyfriend slept on our couch that night and for a month my mom slept in the guest room. If my dad and I get into fights my mom sleeps in our guest room with the door open (our guest room is between my room and my parents room) just in case my dad tries to hit me. He claims his personality doesn't change when he drinks....
Recently however, he's been drinking more. He keeps a stash of alcohol in our dining room and a couple times a night he goes in there and swigs it. It could be tequila, whiskey, vodka, anything. He drinks alcohol that I buy, alcohol my mom buys. He thinks he's slick but I'm paying attention. My mom tends to ignore it or act as though she's completely indifferent to the situation, even though she complains to me about his drinking.
Now he needs a new car and my mom told me he wants to have a talk about my paying rent (that's fine I really should pay some rent) but it's all because he feels he's broke. He makes well over $150,000 a year. He thinks he's broke but I'm guessing he feels that way because he doesn't realize how much of his money he's drinking away.
What do I do??? I've been spending most nights at my boyfriends house so I don't have to see my dad. How do I bring it up to him that I'm not only concerned about his drinking because of his behavior but also for his health???
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