My Childhood.

I have some worries when I do have kids. When I was 4 years old I was sexually abused by my mothers husband (my stepfather). I never told anyone. My mother and I are close and she never knew I couldn't tell her I felt it would break her heart and I don't want her to think it was her fault. I was always told the abuse was my fault and I would get into trouble by my abuser. Even when I was older I thought well I'm older now no one will believe me or care. Just keep your mouth shut and move on. I am so great full to have met my wonderful fiancé. He has been so supportive of me and my fears of having children. I'm afraid I can't protect my child if he or she is anything like me. I'm very good a hiding my feelings. I guess most parents want to protect their children from that sort of thing and they understand. But do they really? My fiancé tells me he understands but in all reality he doesn't. Until you've lived like that you'll never truly understand. I was abused for 11 long years. I just hope when I do have children I create a wonderful bond with them and they can come to me with anything. If I have some advice to give it would be, don't hide this. What this person is doing to you is wrong and it's not your fault. Thanks for any comments or advice!❤️